My friends funeral

It was my friends funeral just over a week ago.
It was very hard, especially for Suzie - I mean what 18 year old likes funerals, this is only the second she has been to, BUT I think she was prob thinking the next time she was gonna be there is gonna be mine. It was horrible to see her so so upset.

I still cannot believe really that S has gone, keep going to text her, and cant believe I wont see her again. Its not like we saw each other every single week, but we were friends. Its just so so sad, and part of this shit disease.

Not much else I can say.
Bye bye my friend
Love
Fi
xxxxx

In memory of my friend S

My friend S, died of secondary BC on Saturday 7th January. She was diagnosed after me, is slightly younger than me, and leaves behind the most wonderful 18 year old girl, who just happens to be Suzie's best friend since 1st year at school. And she leaves behind a husband.

This disease is just so so unfair, for those of us who suffer, and for our loved ones who have been ,or will be left behind.

She went very quickly in the end, which in my opinion, is how I would want to go, but not everyone would agree with that.

Suzie and I are just so sad and shocked, I have not cried yet, and dont yet know when the funeral will be. She never said she was having a private service so waiting to hear.

S was a fun loving, Irish woman, with a wicked sense of humour, and faced up to this disease pretty much as I do. She always had a smile on her face when I saw her, and Suzie and I were lucky enough to have 3 nights in London with her and her daughter just at the end of October, and for this I am thankful. She has a lot of friends and family out there who are going to be suffering greatly.

Sleep peacefully S - no more pain
Thinking of you loads and of course of M, your husband, and R, your gorgeous daughter.
xxxxxx

Todays saying...........You can't start the next chapter of your life if you keep re-reading the last one......Live Laugh Love.

Its a New Year

Well, here we are, 2012, and who would have thought I would still be here and 'well'???
Its amazing really , when I think back, and I know I have said it before but I really am grateful.

So what is this year gonna bring for me?? No doubt in my head, more worries about the cancer, but apart from that, who knows. Just gonna try and enjoy, as I have been doing as much as possible.

I went to McNasty's to see the New Year in, with Suzie, RT and of course lots of other friends from the pub. Had a great night, with lots of laughs, and when it came to 'the bells', they had a piper. Since the mets dx, I always feel a bit 'funny' when the bells strike, and this year was no different. Its not that I am not happy, but just weird not knowing what the next year is gonna bring. Had tears in my eyes, but held them back. Anyway, the piper was really good, great atmosphere, but just a tad emotional.

So thats all the festivities over for another year, took the tree and decs down on 27th, nice to get back to 'normal'.

Today is the official start to my gluten free diet - trying this to see if my horrible bowels improve - hoping this will be the answer, rather than relying on drugs, so have to give it a good go. Going out for lunch tomorrow so that will be trying - hopefully they will know whats gluten free and not. Also starting a healthy eating plan today as I simply have to lose weight - my aim is at least 2 stone, which I know is not gonna be easy. Not joining any sort of club, I know what I should and should not eat, so gonna try to do it on my own, along with gentle exercise. Wish me luck!!!

And today's reading.....
Life in itself is an empty canvas, it becomes whatsoever you paint on it. You can paint misery, you can paint bliss. The freedom is your glory.....Live Laugh Love